God hates Left Handers..

..Seems funny but its not just the middle ages when left handers had to go through the abomination of, well, being left handers...Okay, first things first, I am a left hander, a born, pure left hander who was never forced to become a right hander by his folks, whose left hand was never tied up to force the right one to start working, whose left had fingers were never dipped in mirchi to avoid him using them to er, have food ;)

Some weeks back, an incident took me back to the middle ages! It was a sultry sunday and a series of work related events led me to find myself seated in a huge bright, airy and very clean hall called Vrindavan, full of about 200 people, all seated cross legged having sumptuous albeit holy prasadam at the Iskcon temple in Mumbai. Nothing unusual about this. Every sunday the revered place of devotion attracts thousands of people from all over for a Darshan followed by 'prasadam', just that, as I was enjoying my oil dripping puri with delicious aloo chole ki subzi, suddenly a voice jolted me out of my happy oblivion.
" Is something wrong with your right hand?" asked the voice in monotone.
I looked around to find a human being of the male gender sitting next to me, one hand holding the banana leaf the other hand still trying to make a pile of rice and aloo cholay to gobble up as his next morsel!
Now, being in the divine and holy campus of a temple, my mind, irritated at being spoken to in the middle of me enjoying my food, reacted internally that he might be some 'gifted' man with divine qualities of being able to see the future and maybe he felt that my right hand is going to be 'not fine' in the near future, hence was trying to warn me of some probable accident that might happen in my life rendering my right hand useless!! As my mind raced through a plethora of likely accidents that might happen to me, I replied to him calmly, but with a certain trepidation,
"Er, no it's fine ( as yet) !"
"Then why are you using your LEFT hand?"
Silence
"Coz I have always used my left hand!!"
"Shay! Stop using your left hand from this moment! Dont you know it is the evil who use their left hand and the scriptures have also mentioned this, the left hand should be used only for cleaning up 'you know what' after the morning 'you know what' routine!
Silence
I muttered, " My left hand has served me dutifully all my life, I see no reason why god should hate me for using it, now if you dont mind, may I continue eating...with my left hand'!
The man had a disgusted look on his face, not that i cared to notice. He continued gobbling prasadam with his 'right hand'.

“The right half of the brain controls the left half of the body. This means that only left handed people are in their right mind.”Anonymous